Monday, December 14, 2009

The YogaDawg Holiday Gift Guide 2009

It's not too late to shop for those last minute Holiday gifts. This selection of unique yoga gifts from the GreatTranscendentalYoga SuperStore is sure to thrill your favorite yogi or enlightened being.

The GreatTranscendentalYoga SuperStore

The VedicYoga Enlightenator

Plot your time to enlightenment by sporting this handy Enlightenator that also tracks the amount of money you have spent in the pursuit of yoga perfection. It subtracts the cost of yoga classes, yoga clothes, yoga trips, and yoga workshops while showing you the exact year, month, day, hour, and second to enlightenment on its nifty backlit plasma screen. May also be used to track your karmic debt.

The YogaSanskrit Hand-held Translator

This cool device will assist you during those vexing times in yoga class when the teacher slips into Sanskrit babble and you don’t have a clue what she is saying. The YogaSanskrit Hand-held Translator translates Sanskrit to English, and Sanskrit to Dude/Dudette. A must-have for all aspiring yoga students.

The ThermoChakra Thermometer

This innovative device allows you to check out your chakras to see what state they are in. Coupled with the handy Chakra Healing Guide, you can now balance your own chakras, saving your time and money that you previously paid to the local yoga studio. The ThermoChakra thermometer is available in mouth, underarm, and rectal versions.

The YogicHug Video Game

Pits yoga teachers from different schools of yoga against each other as they attempt to out-pose instructors from other schools. You enter as a 200-hr-level certified teacher, and with each level, you advance to the next stage of teacher training. Bonus levels allow you to progress to Yoga Guru, Yoga Star, and even God.

The YogaEnlightenment Video Game
A cross between the ancient yogic art of spiritual discipline and the more modern art of online gaming, watch the Higher Self rack up high scores while ascending to the next level of consciousness in this transcendentally exciting contest between yogis of different schools and styles. With many real-life obstacles to throw off your yoga practice, this game guarantees hours of absorbing play.

The UtteringOm Bracelet

This bracelet will fill you with harmony, peace, and bliss by murmuring an Om every time you move your arm. A lifesaver in yoga class when you are simply too tired to chant Om.

The ShaktiYoga Forehead Thing

Crafted by a group of 50 local artisans and their families on the west coast of Paradise, this beautifully designed ShaktiYoga Forehead Thing will make you feel like a real yogi when you wear one to yoga class or while shopping at the GreatTranscendentaYoga Super Store.

The KarmaYoga Outdoor Grill

Designed to not only cook your food, this one-of-a-kind grill also burns away bad karma from several lifetimes each time you fire it up. With a 1,375,000 BTU's cooking surface, rotisserie backburners made of Buddhic stainless steel and oblong karmic vaporizer panels, this outdoor grill will dissipate any residual karmic ramifications from your cooking adventure. Its NeverFail Electronic Ignition will have you cooking and burning your karma away for lifetimes to come.

The AhimsaYoga Knives Collection

This full set of kitchen knives that don’t cut and cleavers that don’t chop will allow you to better live non-violently. Features exclusive DoNoHarm cutting surfaces that are rust free and maintains it's dull edges longer than most traditional kitchen knives.

The Yoga Partner

Never be without a yoga partner again. This blow-up, life-size yogi or yogini is the perfect yoga companion for your yoga practice. With its durable construction, it can be safely tucked inside your luggage or rolled around your yoga mat for easy transport to your next yoga class. The Yoga Partner is especially designed to lie in Corpse Pose.

The PatanjaliYoga Portable Yoga Studio
Now own your very own yoga studio. A complete collapsible yoga studio, made of 100% recycled cardboard stock with biodegradable cloth hinges that allow you to set up your very own yoga studio in a matter of seconds. The PatanjaliYoga Portable Yoga Studio is designed from the specifications as described in the Yoga Sutras. It includes a Buddha, a mandala, and an Om symbol etched in henna on the surface as well as a view of the Himalayas.