MY ITCHY THIRD EYE

This YogaDawg blog was mentioned in the August 2009 issue of Yoga Journal. This would be a good time to bring back this classis satirical take of the world of yoga bloggers from the underground yoga guide, My Third Eye Itches.


In the Internet age, the yoga blog is the spiritual heart of yoga. It is where yogis can yammer about the poses they did in class, be loquacious with their spiritual insights, and dissect and chart their inner and outer progress. The yoga blogger writes about the value of yoga in their lives as well as any profound physical, psychological, and spiritual changes that they observe. More importantly, the yoga blog allows the yogi a place to write profound dissertations on the color of their mat, what they ate for breakfast, who was in their class on such and such day, and whether their yoga teacher is hot or not.

Though the yoga blogger may seem self-centered and self-absorbed in their yoga life, they nonetheless feels that this egotistical preoccupation of theirs will yield great insight and profound realizations to their blog readers. Unfortunately, the yoga blogger sometimes has trouble knowing when to stop writing. When this happens, the yoga blog tends to degrade into endless rambling about failed love affairs between fellow yoga students and teachers, mind-numbing questioning of whether the only guy in yoga class is in fact gay, the color of their bowel movements after eating an all vegetarian, free-range, pesticide free, ecotopian, all grain yoga diet for a week, and even detailed descriptions of their newest purchases from the GreatTranscendentalYoga SuperStore.

The great danger is when the blogger thinks that they are a great writer and entertains the idea of penning a yoga book. Their inspiration for this is the great yoga guide book, My Third Eye Itches: A Yoga Guide. They quickly figures out how to cut and paste all of their blog posts into a Word document, which they promptly sends off to the editor in chief of EternallyBlissfulYoga SuperMagazine.