For EternallyBlissfulYoga Super Magazine
In a move that is sure to take the wind out of the debut of the new Harry Potter book, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, YogaDawg Productions announced the publication of the new Yoga humor eBook, My Third Eye Itches.
Described as a “hilarious and satirical look at the neo-pop Yoga scene as practiced today by the cool, tight and trendy pimp-celebrity post-mod BoBo culture”, it has been reported that thousands of YogaDawg fans have gathered inside Yoga studios in major cities around the world over the weekend to discuss this most remarkable eBook and were asking important questions such as, 'Who dies at the end?', 'Does YogaDawg survive?’ and, in particular, “Is HotDawg (a disciple of YogaDawg) still hot or not?”
In Nigeria (headquarters of YogaDawg Productions), YogaDawg had received several email inquiries asking if My Third Eye Itches was some kind of joke and added that they would order a copy if reassured that the eBook is in fact real and not some Nigerian internet scam. YogaDawg Productions has replied with this statement, “This eBook is most certainly real and available. Just press the “Buy” button on the http://www.yogadawg.com/book.htm page. We expect sales to soar once we can get Yogis to stop doing down dogs long enough to click that damn button. Come on, you can do it.”
Weighing in with a hefty 100 pages, reviews of My Third Eye Itches have been almost universally glowing. Noting that the humorous tone of the book is a welcome relief in a jaded Yoga world, YogaDawg, age 97, is likely to see his fortunes swell with the publication of this Yoga masterpiece. He is currently estimated to be worth $211.59 from both sales of My Third Eye Itches and his world famous and much in demand YogaDawg t-shirts. With the publication of the eBook and on the heels of his successful LA tour, there are rumors of a Hollywood adaptation of My Third Eye Itches. If these rumors are true, the film is expected to bring in record global box office receipts.
Meanwhile, in India, police said they seized hundreds of pirated copies of My Third Eye Itches from a customer call center in Bangalor. It is also reported that unscrupulous street vendors are hawking pirated copies to Iyengar and Ashtanga students in both Pune and Mysore.
In a curious side note, in the hours after the release of My Third Eye Itches, Las Vegas bookmakers cut their odds that YogaDawg would actual sell a copy of the eBook, from 1,000,000/1 to 999,998/1. It is reported that there a couple of bets placed from “suspicious looking people wearing high end Yoga clothing and gold Om necklaces”.
Praise for My Third Eye Itches
Baron Baptiste – Not this fucking YogaDawg guy again….
George Bush – Dick, where’s your damn shotgun? This guy is getting on my nerves.
Dick Cheney – I think I’m having a heart attack.
Paris Hilton – YogaDawg’s hot.
Al Gore – YogaDawg is definitely causing global warming with all his hot air.
Rodney Yee – Colleen, is this book going to hurt my Yoga video sales?
Colleen Saidman - Shut up Rodney and go into Childs pose
Lindsey Lohan – It’s not my cocaine, it fell out of the YogaDawg eBook.
Geeta Iyengar – YogaDawg’s hot!
Harry Potter – YogaDawg makes Yoga more fun then Quidditch.
JK Rowling – Shut up Harry. I knew I should have killed your ass off in the last book...