Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Yoga List - What is a YogaDawg?

A Cock and bull story

Fools gold

A Pig in a poke

Mumbo Jumbo

A Shot in the dark

Pie in the Sky

A blind alley

Three sheets to the wind

A Blabbermouth

Makes a mountain out of a mole hill

A sorry sight

Can't make heads or tails of

A fool's paradise

Full of piss and vinegar

A Fate worse than death

Hell in a handbasket

A Whack job

Absent Without Leave

For the Birds

Monday, January 21, 2008

Yoga List - What you can expect to hear in a Yoga class if Yogi Berra is teaching

90% of the game is mental, the other half is physical.

There are some people who, if they don't already know, you can't tell 'em.

In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is.

It ain't over 'til it's over.

When you come to a fork in the road....Take it!

I didn't really say everything I said.

You can observe a lot by watching.

The future ain't what it used to be.

It gets late early out here.

It's deja vu all over again.

If the world were perfect, it wouldn't be.

You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there.

I knew I was going to take the wrong train, so I left early.

If you don't know where you are going, you will wind up somewhere else.

You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours.

I wish I had an answer to that because I'm tired of answering that question.

I'm not going to buy my kids an encyclopedia. Let them walk to school like I did.

Nobody goes there anymore. It's too crowded.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Yoga List - Things a Yoga studio will not allow

Lame ducks

Foregone conclusions

Non-edifying behavior

Nuclear proliferation

Being badgered to death

Binge drinking

Hissy fits

Magic realism

Walking the plank

Montezuma's Revenge

Moving the goalposts

Flying off the handle

Beating a hasty retreat

Nautical phrases

Mickey Finns

Channel surfing

Glass ceilings

Crocodile tears

Jaws of death

Pots calling the kettle black

Technicolor yawns

Teflon presidents

The third degree

Raising Cain

Urban myths

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Yoga List - Type of student you will find in a Yoga class

Wet Blanket

Doubting Thomas

Back Seat Driver

Fashion Victim

Dead Ringer

Devil's Advocate

Diamond in the Rough

A Dope

Loose Cannon

Mad Hatter

Bag Man

Scapegoat

Son of a Gun

Yes Man

One-hit Wonder

Peeping Tom

Wolf In Sheep's Clothing

Shit for Brains

Stool Pigeon

Sick Puppy

Whipping Boy

Straw Man

Bad Egg

Basket Case

Blonde Bombshell

Blue Blood

Clod-Hopper

Sunday, January 13, 2008

Yoga List - What a Yoga teacher will expect from you during a Yoga class

Let sleeping dogs lie

Live and let live

Pay the piper

Schmooze

Shoot the breeze

Zilch

A sea change

A shot in the arm

Baptism by fire

Bated breath

Blow your mind

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Yoga List - Additional services you can expect to find at a Yoga studio

Water divining

Molybdomancy

Aura balancing

Aeromancy

Tarot reading

Trepanation

Sanskrit translation services

Myomancy

Crop circle interpretation

Anthropomancy

Alien abductees counseling

Causimomancy

Ear candling

Speleotherapy

Renal/rectal philology

Empyromancy

Dowsing

Colonic cleansing

Scatoscopy

Craniosacral therapy

Extispicium

Reading Tea Leaves

Tring-ba

Vedic Astrology

Uromancy

Clairvoyance

Geloscopy

Snake handling

Monday, January 07, 2008

Yoga List - What the Teacher is doing while you are in Savasana

Mexican Wave

Pulling the Wool Over Their Eyes

Pushing the Envelope

Quality Time

Running out of Steam

Safe Sex

Shaking a Leg

Zigger Zigger

Being all Ears

Beats Me

Calls it a Day

Going with the Flow

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.....

Saturday, January 05, 2008

Yoga List - What not to say to a Yoga teacher during class

Woe is me

The blind leading the blind

Break A leg

You can lead a whore to culture but you can't make her think

Yada yada

What's up Doc?

Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things

Throw in the towel

That's all folks!

Talk to the hand

You've got to be kidding!

Yucky

A little knowledge is a dangerous thing

Tell it to the marines

Abandon all hope ye who enter here

Hasta la vista, baby

Et tu, Brute

Elvis has left the building

Thursday, January 03, 2008

Yoga List - Yoga poses we hope we never see

Chew the Cud

Flip The Bird

Fly on the Wall

Foam at the Mouth

Balls to the Wall

Chicken with its Head Cut Off

Red Herring

Fly in the Ointment

Three Dog Night

Charley Horse

Drop like Flies

Wolf in Sheep's Clothing

Eye of Newt and Toe of Frog, Wool of Bat and Tongue of Dog

Dirty Rat

Kick the Bucket

Not Have a Leg to Stand On

An Eye for an Eye, a Tooth for a Tooth

Cold Turkey

Cold Duck